"Graduating" 5th grade

My first born is finished with elementary school tomorrow, and heads to (the dreaded) middle school in the fall. I know all parents whine the same old wheeze, but it's really true: It seems like just yesterday that I was holding my first born as a newborn in my arms, and now I'm getting ready to deal with teenage angst.

Although the elementary school doesn't hold graduation ceremonies, as some do, for 5th graders, tonight the class had their own celebration, with a potluck dinner and speeches giving advice to their fellow students by each member of the class. They also sang two songs they had practiced and prepared especially for the parents.

While all the speeches were thoughtful, I thought my offspring's was superior to the rest. With the exception of two other girls, who also always give fine speeches, the majority of them sounded like 5th grade speeches. I think my child was superior in structure, language, and every respect. But judge how good it is for yourself:

"My fellow classmates. I have great pleasure in telling you that this year has been incredible. This year was the best.

One piece of advice I have for you is: Follow your passion. This is VERY important advice. If you stick with a REALLY strong passion, you'll do better in life. Another piece of advice I want to share is: Treat others the way YOU want to be treated. Kindness (and bullying) is like a boomerang; it always comes back. If you want to be successful in life, do exactly this! One last piece I have is: Don't risk breaking a rule. If ou break a rule (on purpose!) you can get in trouble! Don't risk getting in serious trouble, and you will be happier!

I'd like to thank my mom and dad for supporting me, Finn for being able to work with me, and everyone else for being GREAT classmates."